2019 June 3, Un-Grooming Report and some real information too;

2019 June 3, Un-Grooming Report and some real information too;


Please see some real and useful summer event schedule information below the Un-Grooming Report drivel:


Having never lost the ability to resist an urge to shut up, I feel compelled to provide the denouement to last week’s derailleur dust up.  So, after the good Samaritan provided door to door service I had just enough time to coast down to see my trusted wrenches at the shop.  I forced my foot in the door as Matt was trying to lock up and explained my plight.  The very next day I was collecting my bike with shiny new parts when our friends on the Nova Scotia junket walked in.

Again, resisting the urge as above, I recounted the day I purchased my (still in my eyes anyway) new Tarmac.  I expect it was over ten years ago now and I was in the shop to get a new drive train on my chrome molly Trek.  We were debating going back to a five cog freewheel because the six speed left too little clearance between the chain stays.  Of course, I received some well deserved guff for the whole idea of getting an investment quality drive train on a 35 year old bike (actually, I don’t know how old it is because some parts pre-date the frame purchased in the early 80s).

Cue dream sequence effect: Matt says to one of the guys, “Hey, grab that Tarmac off the wall and have Sondo take for a spin.”. Now, mind you, my budget for the trip was about $200.  The Tarmac, let’s just say, is a different number of digits.  Well, I don’t know if either of you have even seen a steel alloy bike much less ridden one but they are rather different than that to which we have become accustom.  I pretend I still like my Trek but only really ride it when lending my “new” bike to visiting friends or relatives.

Anyway, I don’t know about you but setting bike seat height is an exacting science.  I typically fiddle with it for days before it is just right.  However, as if divine providence, the seat was perfect!  I pretended it was a sign. Were I conspiracy theorist, Matt would have figured a way to get the seat just right knowing I would not be able to resist.  However, with Sondo being translated as “User of old sporting goods equipment”, I am not prone to such snap decisions so I called the budget director.  To my great good fortune, there was no answer.  You know, it is like when happy hour is going well and you phone home to deliver the “I’ll be late” news.  The best result is being able to say, “I called but there was no answer”.

So I’m delivering the story’s punch line about never having touched the seat height to this day when the wrench tells us, “You’ll have to adjust it now.  I had to move it up to fit in the Park stand.”.  Egad! I couldn’t believe my ears.  It’s like when the valet brings your car back and all the radio pre-sets are changed only far more impactful. I was reminded of the Twilight Zone episode in which our protagonist throws a coin in the newspaper vendor’s collection box and it lands on end as opposed to either heads or tails.  The freak occurrence trigger’s an ability to read people’s mind.  He spends a fitful day dealing with this new and awesome power.  Then, on the way home picking up the evening paper his next coin knocks over the first and his power vanishes.   A Pisces, I don’t believe in such supernatural effects so I am just setting about getting the seat right.  I’ll fiddle for a few days and then mark the seat post this time; it was not my first rookie mistake last week.

Important Event Schedule Information:

This is just like the grocery store.  You know, the milk and eggs, the stuff you really came for, is at the back of the store and you have to walk past all the carefully place impulse buy items; sorry.  Anyway,  I trust you have both marked your calendar but this is just a reminder.

  • The Trails fest (June 21-23) is right around the corner with the
  • Forestville Festival (July 12-13) hot on its heels.
  • The O2S (August 10),
  • Trail 50 (August 16-17) and
  • Marquette Marathon (August 31) have August filled up.


If you don’t understand each event you have some required reading. These are world class events right in our back yard. I will likely resist the urge to shut up about these events as they draw nigh.  Anyway, go to www.noquetrails.org and follow the events link to find out what you have been missing.  See you out there.